Robin vs. Wild

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Robin vs. Wild is the fourth text blog of the Harper's Globe web series. It was posted on March 20, 2009 by Robin at 4:40 pm. The description accompanying the post read "For the first time in my life, I wanna start looking around."

Text

Looking in the past is always rough because you have the benefit of hindsight. Oh, I should or shouldn't have done that, I wish I had taken this or that opportunity, etc. And sometimes I get sad about the things I didn't do, or wasn't offered. But the thing is, the life I lead is the life I led. All my choices, good or bad, brought me here. And I'd like to think that had I wanted to do something or go somewhere, I would have.

But I look back and realize I've never been anywhere, and I haven't really done anything. Home and school and here, that's it. My family never traveled, and I guess when I had the chance to, I chose not to. I had friends who went on weekend trips together, who went on post-high school trips to Europe. Invitations were extended to me, but I always turned them down.

See, I didn't want to go somewhere and then come back; I just wanted to go, to get out of Pleasant Prairie. I wanted to make something of my life beyond my small town. So I worked, while everyone else traveled. And then when I finally left for school, when I thought I could finally say yes to all those fun invitations, I found myself sitting in my room on the weekends doing homework, blogging, and reading. What does that mean? Am I scared to venture out into the world, and work is just my excuse? Or am I a workaholic who doesn't know how to have fun?

Really, it doesn't matter which one is the right answer, because no matter what, it has to change. I need to change. And, like: now.

From what I see from the office windows, Harper's Island is too beautiful to ignore. I'm a girl from the plains; this is all unbelievable to me. I've never lived on an Island before. Or a place with such natural beauty. When the morning fog lifts, and I look out over the ocean, it stuns me into silence. That's when I start thinking that all this time spent with my head down, eyes on the page, has been a complete mistake.

For the first time in my life, I wanna start looking around.

So now I have the motivation to stop working and start exploring, I just need to know where to start. I don’t know... can I hire someone for this? Are their tour guides in the off-season? Will I look like a complete dork being lead around town by a guy in a tour guide vest and knee high socks? But really, will this make me any more of a dork than I already am? (Don't answer that last one, it's rhetorical. Obviously.)

Extras

  • Song: Magic Man - "The Aliens"
  • Mood: Blank

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